(no subject)

[keyk]

Whoo, insomnia, yeeeaaaahhh. I'm pretty sure it's from the all dreaded females before that thing starts stuff. Good grief. I swear I have the worst cases of PMS among those people I hang out with. Mood dropping far down for no apparent reason, really bad insomnia, heightened frequency of headaches,really bad hunger pangs (hard since I'm a vegetarian now; there's a big lack of food)--I may not have the worst cramps there are, but PMS SUCKS.

...and now I'm looking things up on PMS and PMDD. Which I shouldn't be. It's almost 2:00 AM.

Just before this, I was reading up on copyright laws. It was fairly distracting and interesting even though I was surprisingly aware (considering I normally am not saddaysadday) of most of what I'd read up on. I kept it up for several hours. Wow.

Before that, I watched my sis finish Ape Escape 3 (SPEECTARRRR), finished K-ON with sibs (I...I really liked it), knitted (I made my stitches too tight while using really crummy yarn, so it was really hard), attempted to animate (note the first word of this phrase), and now I'm drawing.

Ahh, say, does this mean I have PMDD rather than PMS?
.......oh, darn, it looks like I do. Gah, wait, what am I doing diagnosing myself at a time like this?!

Comments

[jamuko.livejournal.com]

I feel you on the PMS. >o< I get it really weird too, like (sorry if this is TMI) it's rather irregular and my cycle is abnormally long, and sometimes I'll get the PMS symptoms and it'll seem like it'll start any day now, and then it's weeks before it actually comes. (I'm waiting on it now, actually >.< )

As annoying as it is though, I seem to get interested by it also for some sick reason XD and I look stuff up about it too. It started I guess just from trying to find tips and ways to stop the pain when it gets really bad, but then I just get overall fascinated with the weirdness of it all.

Do you sometimes get that weird thing where something will make you want to cry for some reason and you can't really put your finger on it? Or maybe you can, but it's something you would have been able to deal with without coming anywhere close to crying any other time? Sometimes it doesn't even make any sense, like I'll hear a song that isn't even sad and it'll make me cry, or looking at the sky or something. I might have PMDD too, especially since my cramps are often quite horrible, but I've never been to a gynocologist and I'm scared ._. I really should go though..

As for food, can you still eat "animal products" that aren't meats, like milk/cheese products and stuff with gelatin? I find that PB&Js are good and easy ways to satisfy hunger and they just sit well in my tummy. If you keep a good stock of those materials then it's quick and easy to make one and eat it whenever you want. :3 (I think we talked about this recently, actually.. XD ) Peanut butter is good protein too, which is especially good if you're not eating meats!

Copyright laws are kinda interesting to me if they involve fanart and that kind of thing, but anything else, dunno. XD I'm also a bit interested in uhh.. well, this might sound weird, but laws on like.. lolicon and stuff ^^;; I dunno, I find it kinda stupid that people group together drawn pictures with actual CP which is wrong. I remember some headline where someone said "victims don't have to exist" which sounds silly to me. XD It just seems like unfair censorship and restriction of freedom of speech to make "underage" doujins illegal when it's completely made up and nobody was harmed or will be harmed because of it (not to mention that there's not even a real way to tell an anime character's age a lot of times, because they often look rather young just because of the style, and since they don't really exist, they can't have a real age).

I dunno, I've always kinda been interested in strange things like how our country is perfectly fine with anything violent or horrific in the media (for the most part) but uhh.. "adult" things are treated entirely differently. I find it interesting since they should both be the same in terms of how you need to be mature enough to separate fiction from reality, and it seems like people understand that concept when it comes to violence, but for adult stuff it's like WHOA WHOA WHOA THIS IS WRONG! I mean.. it's not like I wanna see it everywhere either, but.. I dunno XD I guess the logic just doesn't make sense to me.

We probably only feel that way because that's the way we were raised to view it and expect in this country. If you detach yourself from what we're accustomed to and look at the facts of each of those things, violence should really be worse, since violence is out of hate and only brings harm and kills people, while adult stuff is supposed to be a thing out of love, and is a natural thing to advance the human race. They both can have huge consequences of course, but the way we view it just seems a little backwards. Again, I'm not really complaining about it and I feel just fine the way it is for the most part, I just find it odd when I sit and think about it XD I just dunno! TAT

Geez, I really have a habit of rambling to you, don't I? ^^;; I'm sorry. @_@;

[jamuko.livejournal.com]

Oh yeah, and a small thing to tack on the the lolicon laws and stuff, is how the worst part about it is that since they seem to want to treat loli the same way as real CP, then someone who gets caught importing a loli doujin or something will get arrested and go to court for possession of child pornography, which ends up getting them registered on that sex offender registry where they are publically posted with a mugshot where they live and everyone assumes they're a dirty horrible child molester and avoids them at all costs. I'm sure it'd inhibit their ability to get a job, too. Treated the same as if they abused a child, just because they had a totally fictional hand-drawn comic of a character that looked young.

Of course, it seems like it's tough for anyone to stand their ground about laws like that, no matter how crazy, because politicians aren't going to risk their position by taking a controversial stance like that that could be misinterpreted as defending pedophiles and child abuse to anyone who isn't really paying attention.

Luckily, those cases seem to be rare and I THINK the US generally rules in favor of freedom of speech still, but I'm not entirely sure on that. I just think the whole thing is weird. People are just totally paranoid when it comes to kids, I guess.

[keyk.livejournal.com]

My sis and I get that problem, too! (I think I'm going to be more TMI than you, really XD;) Long cycles (occasionally really short ones, too, like, what, one day?) and long periods of no period. There was one point where my period was coming out in REALLY large amounts (it was worse since we were at our cousins' house; I somehow avoided staining anything of theirs Q_Q;), and my sis had it, too. We used to have pretty synchronized menstrual cycles, but now that we've moved, they're not anymore. I had a regular period for awhile (it died this month, though C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER), and my sis hasn't had hers for quite sometime (hope she doesn't mind my telling you this). Despite what the acronym stands for, I get PMS symptoms, but even after they fade, I still haven't had my period! It's irritating. DX I have feeling it'll be that way this time, too. Most people seem to know when theirs comes, so why are ours so unpredictable?! XD; I love researching gross health things, but weird thing is, I don't like looking at picture representations (though I do out of curiosity anyway). I'm squeamish. |D

And yes about that crying thing! It's so weird! @_@; I think back on it, and I go, why did I cry that time again? Gynecologists scare me somehow (though I do find it weirdly amusing how the majority of gynecologists seem to be male, but somehow I feel like I shouldn't be surprised). XD;; I still have my pediatrician!

I can still eat animal products, yes! I wouldn't if I could avoid it, but my parents are finding it difficult enough NOT giving me meat since almost all Filipino foods require some sort of meat. Too bad we don't have bread or jam/jelly right now though. That stuff tastes so good toasted. ;___; I think I'm ok in the protein department! Not too sure about the iron part though. XD;

....That...was EXACTLY the stuff I was reading up on--including the lolicon stuff. XD;;; Well, I'd also add parody games to that, too. I've wanted to make a series of parody games! But while it's technically legal, it doesn't mean the company won't prod at you and drag you to court. "Victims don't have to exist"..?--what...I feel like I've heard that before though. XD;;; I was raised in a setting where anything regarding sex is BAD AND EVIL BLAHBLAH, but I don't think that way anymore. I think that a good chunk of it is because we've lived in a patriarchal and christian society for a long time now, so violence is OK!--look where it's gotten us!--but women parts are a nono, because women are dirty--think Eve! If it was ACTUAL child pornography, I'd understand, since the children depicted are the victims, but fictional stuff? I admit I have a soft spot for fandom, but the quick to judge attitude I seem to see when this stuff goes to court kinda irks me. ^^; Porn is porn though, when it comes to court. But I guess if a lawyer really did try to stand up for this kind of stuff, it wouldn't be very good for his name. Ahh, fandom.

Sex and stuff don't really bother me so much as really bloody and gory things. XD; I cringe when I see really bloody and graphic things, but I don't see why people need to be so against sex. What's wrong with procreation, guys? And why isn't murder looked down upon more? Both elements can be used to make interesting stories, so I don't really mind their usage in media and things, but it's weird that bloodier things are usually allowed for kids and teenagers to see while sex is not. XD;; So what if it's a naked body people?! Chillax--you've got them parts, too!

I love your rants though. ;___; Very few people like to rant with me, so I really enjoy yours (though I'm not that good at giving much back XD;;)!

[jamuko.livejournal.com]

Holy crap, I.. I don't even...

"Sorry, but your comment of 16260 characters exceeds the maximum character length of 4300. Please go back, shorten it, and try posting it again."


.....I feel ashamed to post it now OTZ

[keyk.livejournal.com]

Ahahahaha! XD That's amazing.

So post it, you.

[jamuko.livejournal.com]

Ee.. well here goes then @o@;; *prepares to publish her award-winning novel*

[jamuko.livejournal.com]

Ooh! You know what, a while ago I joined this site, mymonthlycycles.com XDD that sounds totally weird and nerdy, hahaha. But, I've found it useful because there's a calendar where you mark the day you have your period start (pretty much the only thing I use the site for) and it keeps track of those, and shows you how many days you've had between each, and your average and stuff. I think there are features to tell your fertile days and stuff like that but I have no need to pay attention to that as of now o_O I guess it's useful if you're trying to have a baby? Or if you're just weirdly curious XD

Anyway, I always told doctors that my period was regular when they asked, because nothing seemed too weird to me and I hadn't been recording or paying much attention to how regular it is. Well, thanks to this site I know how irregular it can be. XD My average is already a bit abnormally long in between (40 days or so, but that ranges a lot along the 30s and 40s) and sometimes it'll go crazy and be in the 50s. That's not the "norm" but it's not all that uncommon so I'm not even too surprised when it happens. I just hope it doesn't mean there's something wrong with me o_O like maybe I'm too underweight?

I also get um.. (okay this is probably TMI for me this time XD but I guess we've established that it's okay hehehe ) I guess it's "spotting" that happens sometimes which confuses me for how I'm supposed to record it. Like.. sometimes, with those really long ones approaching 50-60 days, it's like I'll go the normal time around 40 days and then have a "mini-period" where it's not normal at all, just really small amounts (but still enough to wear a pad so nothing stains) and kind of.. brown >_> for a while and then stops. Usually, then after that I'll get a regular period in a shorter amount of time after that, like <20 days or so. So I dunno if that "spotting" is a regular period that just got messed up, or what..?

I'm slightly worried that there's something wrong with me, so I should really face my fears and see the gyn (especially since my insurance runs out this year when I turn 23 ^^;; ) I really hope it's nothing wrong, at least nothing permanent or anything. I'd be crushed if it was something really bad like I would be infertile and could never have kids or something like that. T___T I don't like jumping to any fearful conclusions and I have no solid grounds to think that, so I'm not THAT worried, but I just have that little nagging feeling that I might be messed up. ;_; And if it has to do with my weight, that doesn't make a lot of sense either because it seems to be my natural body weight that it maintains no matter how much I eat (a lot XD ).

Speaking of weird body problems, I have this annoying messed up part of my ribcage. .-. That bothers me but I'm sure there's absolutely nothing that can be done unless I was crazy and got it fixed with surgery or something. I'm not sure why I have it, if it was a genetic messup or if I was squished as a baby or something. XD But basically, my right side of my ribcage is normal, but the left side is abnormally shaped, like someone pushed in the upper part (around where it connects to the sternum thing) and that made it jut out a bit on the lower part. It's not a HUGE deal, but it does look a bit weird .-. and pointy where it juts out, which makes me look even bonier than I already am just from being lightweight. ;_; I don't think it's noticible if I'm wearing a shirt, but maybe if I'm wearing one of the close-fitting ones and someone pays enough attention.

[jamuko.livejournal.com]

I do wonder if some of my pains when I was younger had to do with that. In PE, I would get really horrible cramps a lot of times when running the mile... like, worse than normal running cramps. It would feel like a tightening chest pain sometimes and be difficult to breathe, and I couldn't get a deep breath until my heart rate went back down. I kinda wondered if one of my lungs was squished by the sunken ribs or something .-. but I don't know my anatomy well enough to really tell if that could be possible. I also remember one specific time, it hurt EXTREMELY bad, right there in the weird part of my ribcage. It felt as if I had a broken rib, very sharp stinging pain in my lower left ribs and it hurt to breath or move, yet I had done nothing that could have made a blow to my ribs to break it or anything (just regular running). I never found out what the deal with that was, but I wonder if I broke some cartilage in there or something since it's shaped weird and maybe not as structurally sound. I guess the twisting motion of your abdomen when running could have done that to me if my ribs were weak in that way. I dunno.. :S

I kinda worry now that I have problems because I rarely go to the doctor, and when I do, I'm scared so I just let them do whatever and never bring up any concerns myself XD and they always said I'm fine. But now when I go, which should be soon >_>, I should probably ask about all these weird random things just to know what the deal is. I kinda doubt they'd know much about what's up with my ribs though, unless I got an x-ray which would be expensive and I guess no good reason if it's not doing me any harm now.

Aside from one urgent care appointment I had for my throat recently when I got a throat infection, I haven't been to the doctor since.. well, 4 years ago now I guess .___. that's pretty bad I think. ^^; I better do that soon also. I just hate physicals. T__T I think I was traumatized when I went one time and they told me to remove all my clothes and put on that thin paper robe. ^^;; I wasn't expecting that and I was an extremely shy and private person, so that was really horrible for me. ^^;; I think I'm a bit better about that kind of thing now and I'm not so ashamed and hide my body so much anymore, but I'm still not comfortable with removing all my clothes at a doctor's office >_> but I guess, it'd be weirder if I was, right? ^^; I just gotta suck it up and go.

For gynecologists, I think you can usually request whichever gender you want! I assumed people would usually want a female doctor, just because it seems less awkward since there's less chance of it being a turnon or something, XD or just not wanting to show their private parts to a man other than someone they're with which is understandable I guess. But apparently some people trust male doctors more, or I guess think that maybe they'd be more interested in female genitalia so maybe they'd know their stuff better XDD I'd go with a girl, though. ^^; Girl doctors seem more sympathetic and understanding usually, and guys are more coldly medical. Not that that's really bad... in the case of gynecology, I think it'd be even weirder if the guy was trying to comfort you while doing it. XDD but I'm just scared not only because it's embarrassing, but.. I don't want them shoving instruments up there. >_____< but I gotta..

[jamuko.livejournal.com]

The crying thing is weird, but in some ways it might be even weirder if it went away. XD Like, it's like a monthly dose of sensitive emotion that you get, and if it stopped then you might feel like some kind of drone robot after a while. XD Not that you wouldn't have emotions or anything, but I dunno. I think we girls just get used to having that sort of deep sensitivity that comes along now and then. It's not always bad, like a lot of times I cry in a "the world is beautiful" sort of way. XD And you just feel things really deeply. I guess it lets things touch your heart more, so that much is nice.

Iron, hmm.. I think I was tested for anemia one time (again because of my low weight ). XD But, I was apparently fine, so I guess I'm okay on iron (or at least, I was those years ago when I was tested >_> ). I probably need more potassium though, because I notice I've been getting random bruises on my legs for no good reason. (I might have talked to you about this recently too? XD )

...Wow... that's crazy that I went off on some crazy tangent rant and it just happened to be exactly what you were reading before. XDD But it's interesting! For parody games, for a long time I've wanted to make a Phoenix Wright fan-game! I'm not sure if I ever talked about it with you before, it was a couple years ago that I was really thinking about it. I basically wanted to take all the exact same graphics for menus and stuff and same sound effects and everything, but make my own characters, and make a whole original game with the same exact feel and style of PW. I never got much further than some basic character designs and some vague story brainstorming though ._. oh, and downloading all the rips of graphics and sound effects. XDD (Thanks, Internets!)

Do companies really care about that kind of thing if you're not making any money off it? It seems like the kind of thing they'd only bother with if it got popular and you started bringing in some income with it. What kinds of parody games were you thinking of? *_*

As for loli stuff again.. here's the article thingy. http://www.sankakucomplex.com/2009/01/07/20-years-for-loli-manga-%E2%80%9Cvictims-don%E2%80%99t-have-to-exist%E2%80%9D/ XD DANG, I totally forgot the dude was from RICHMOND, VIRGINIA, WHERE I LIVE AT COLLEGE XDD It's sliiightly more understandable considering they mention he was caught with actual CP in the past, but I was under the impression that each case is its own separate deal and the point still stands that sentencing 20 years in prison for possessing loli manga is pretty ridiculous. :S

I guess it scares me that something I consider to not be immoral is actually against the law. When you're a kid you know to respect authority and you always assume that laws are to be respected, and are rules for a good reason. So I guess when I find something like this where a law goes against my personal values, it starts to make me scared since I realize the government isn't so purely in line with proper morals as I assumed as a kid. :<

I feel the same about a lot of drug things... they always teach you DRUGS are BAD!!! which isn't WRONG, but, it's not exactly right either, at least not the way they instill it in us. I found it very odd when I learned that marijuana is actually much less harmful, intoxicating, and addictive than things that are perfectly legal like cigarettes and alcohol. Marijuana is probably the least harmful one there is, while cigarettes and alcohol are a leading cause of death. For some reason, it just has such a horrible stigma, and I'm not sure why. It really doesn't make any sense for nicotine and alcohol to be legal and still come down hard on marijunana.

[jamuko.livejournal.com]

It took me a while to get to this point of open-mindedness regarding things that we're taught are wrong and bad like these things, but I guess it's just a point you reach in maturity when you can think for yourself enough to realize that. I think society is afraid that if we are open-minded about those things, we will get engrossed by them, and become perverse beings far off the deep end, and that's really just so paranoid. XD I think we should have more faith in people than to assume that. I mean, if we have enough common sense to come to these conclusions, we should have enough common sense to determine how to approach them in our lives. Just like most of us stay away from smoking cigarettes even though they're legal... we know the harm of it, and whether people do it or not, that's their educated choice.

Speaking of controversial laws... I think even with actual CP, which truly is something that shouldn't be tolerated when it destroys children psychologically (not including the whole messed up "sexting" controversies but that's a whole other topic XDD ), I think the penalties are too harsh for possession. I'm not even sure what they are, but I don't think they are soft. I'm pretty sure you get on the sex offender registry thing too. And like.. while I understand the concept, and how they are the "customers" and so they're contributing to the production of it, it's the actual production of it that is the crime. Viewing it certainly doesn't help, but that seems like something you should get more of an equivalent of a slap on the wrist for, while they should enact much more harsh penalties on the ones actually producing the stuff and using those children. I know it makes sense to kind of try to "snuff it all out" but it's at the expense of people who really aren't doing something THAT wrong in themselves. It's kinda like that crazy Jack Thompson guy who wanted to ban violent video games, saying they contributed to real-life violence. XD

And even with this, I'm thinking REALLY underage, like when you think of the word "child". Someone so young that they are unable to have sexual urges of their own accord, and are doing it under pressure or coersion from adults. That's the stuff that is really wrong, but when you get into "into puberty but not yet 18" jailbait type situations it's even more sticky. ~_~ Obviously, some people in that age range can do such things of their own will (and quite often do, it seems), which shouldn't be surprising because.. that's what puberty IS. XD but the fact that we for some reason label 18 to be the magical age of consent, apparently people under that age are completely unable to make their own choices. e_e; I dunno, it's weird... (and now that I think about it, isn't the age around 16 supposed to be when people rebel against authority and such anyway? XD Wouldn't that make it even harder to take advantage of them? )

[jamuko.livejournal.com]

That also gets into the "sexting" thing, which is so ridiculous I almost don't even need to rant on it. XD It's just so silly that an underage couple sending each other private nude pics get charged with child pornography. Is it kind of a dumb thing to do? Maybe, but since when do people that age not do dumb things? XD and dumb = illegal and screwed for life? o_O; They got put on the sex offender registry too. I mean, come on.. D: also the fact that that isn't even porn to begin with, it's just the human body as you said. :| but even if/when it is pornographic in nature, if they're BOTH underage, and sending private images to each other as part of their relationship, it's totally ridiculous to call that a sex offense for child pornography. There's no questionable "adult taking advantage of their authority over a child" pressure that makes the other stuff wrong. They should probably be warned/educated about doing it, so that they might consider the possible consequences if the images get leaked to someone they don't expect, but seriously that consequence is the worst thing that could happen and the psychological pain on whoever made the mistake of giving the pics is bad enough. Do they really need to have the law come down on them like that? =_= That kind of steep punishment would seriously ruin a person's life, especially when they are so young. (Wait, how come they get the penalty of an adult when their crime involves being underage? XD )

Okay, so I ranted about that anyway. XD (I'm glad you like the rants, though ^^;;; and don't worry about the amount you give back, it's obviously plenty for me to work with XDD )

"Chillax"-ing about the naked body is a huge thing too. XD It's so silly when you think about it. It's just who we are... and while it's all well and good to save your more private parts for a special kind of trust and relationship, I find it really sad that our society is so.. ashamed? of the human body that we must look away if one is shown and we feel so awkward around statues like Michelangelo's David. I remember learning about that statue as a kid and I felt so incredibly awkward about it, like I shouldn't look at it because it was dirty and wrong. That's so horrible, it's a work of art supposed to depict the beauty of the human form! I even heard (I took a sexuality class last semester XD ) that some women are so ashamed of their naked bodies that even after they are married, they won't even allow their husbands to see them, and will only do sexual things with the lights off or under the covers or the man blindfolded or things like that because they are too ashamed to allow even the person they love the most and choose to spend their life with to see their whole body. I find that really sad.

[jamuko.livejournal.com]

Um........ enjoy? 8D;;;;

*runs off into a corner of shame*

[keyk.livejournal.com]

Uh, uh, WOW. XD I will do my best to respond!

I will bookmark that site since I rally should keep track of my periods. It makes my docs annoyed when I say I don't know. XD I actually get that, too. ^^; Mine is almost always brown though, if that's weird. (Yay, TMI! As long as I ain't seeing it, I'm good. XD;)I get large splotches of brown a lot--it's only every other or so period that I get some red, or it's brown for awhile, and then red. I think that's just leftover or clotted stuff (ew), so I don't think it's a big problem. :D; I thought I poo-ed my pants when I had my first one so I was all WHAT THE--. XD;;;

As for irregularity, I think it's mostly hormonal imbalance? @_@; I DON'T think it's anything permanent (I'm not 100% sure though T_T;), so don't panic!...and, yeah, tell your doctor. For all the health problems I complain about, I only go to the doctor for my annual checkup (which my parents drag me to), and I don't tell them about my irregular period or too much of anything else (except scoliosis and my butt prob; one is school-told, the other I needed to prevent from getting too irritated @_@;;) either, haha. XD;;

Paper robes! I was totally WHAT the first time they asked me to put on just a paper robe! XD; They shoved me into a dinky closet-y thing, and told me to put on this thin...THING. I put it on wrong, so I didn't cover up...very well. XD; That was for my first x-ray ever, so I was pretty scared. The second time, they forgot to give me the apron thing that protects the reproductive area from the x-rays. They made me lay down on a metal table, which was kind of uncomfortable and...awkward. ^^; I'm still not comfortable doing either...I'm also half worrying someone will steal my clothes or something, haha...XD;;; For your ribs...I think it'd be good to mention it, but if they offer an x-ray, you can casually refuse...? XD;; If this is the first time you're going in four years, I think it's time to 'fess up! Ah, do you have a kind of dent in your chest area? Pectus excavatum? (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pectus_excavatum) I kind of doubt it, or if it is, it sounds relatively minor, so it might not be too big deal after all? XD;;;;

I cry really easily, so I usually attributed the crying for things I usually don't to that. I hadn't thought of it that way before, but yeah, I guess it is nice! *__*

It doesn't seem like I'm anemic, since my blood pressure is actually pretty high. It's a bit weird since I get all of these symptoms of anemia and people with low blood pressure. ^^; My dad says it's due to a lack of hemoglobin, but I've yet to look into it. I need vitamin B12 supplements though. XD Potassium...that rings a bell--we were talking about bananas once!...and fried Filipino bananas (how much potassium would there still be if you fried it though..?)!

[keyk.livejournal.com]

For parody games, I wanted to make a Katamari one, an Ape Escape one, and a Brave Fencer Musashi one (from what I can remember--I feel like t here's more @_@) using my sis's and my original characters. XD; Some companies apparently do get bothered by it--at least that's what it said in the e-mail response they gave someone. Some companies also program the system they made for the game, so that could also be a problem. It's just kind of iffy turf, but Capcom LOVES its fans (so I heard), so I don't think they'd mind if you made one! :D

Oh, man, gee, 20 years? :/ I agree, they ARE harsh. And, that teen couple? GEEZ--seriously? D: That's harsh. That bites that they're on the sex offenders list now. They're...teenagers, like you said! I hear you on the CP thing. I hadn't realized how harsh the law is with this stuff! Owners of it sure get punished steeply, huh. T_T; The makers are the ones who should be getting punished, I agree.

I wasn't aware that marijuana was like that at all! I'm still being fed the DRUGS ARE BAAAD stuff, so this is news to me! XD Say, isn't marijuana being considered something that can be medically prescribed now? It's name is still pretty tainted, so I'm not too sure.

Open-mindedness took awhile for me to come by, too. But it's great to know so many open-minded people out there! *__* THEY DO EXIST! which makes me very happy. |D I just wish there were more out there. ^^;

Oh, yeah! The statue of David! In LA, there's this house with a BUNCH of David statues in the front yard, and I heard the owner's gotten quite a few complaints for it! When I was younger, I always turned away and thought it rather vulgar, but now I don't. Must suck to be that owner (as much as I don't mind though...I still wouldn't put tens of them in my front yard XD). As artists, we love the human body (though the innards are still things I run from XD;;;;)! Yeah!

......I would buy your novel any day. |Db

[jamuko.livejournal.com]

I no longer have the energy to rant a whole lot back. XD I give you props for even reading it. OTZ

The site is good~ you can have it remind you by email in case you forget to mark it, too. XD Though my problem is that when it "reminds" me, my period hasn't actually started yet ;_;

Hahaha!! Poor K XDD when you thought you poo'd your pants. I remember I was worried for a while back then too because of getting random whitish or clearish discharge when it wasn't monthly-time, I thought maybe I had gotten an STD somehow even though I hadn't done anything @_@;; like from some rare occurrence like a toilet seat, or maybe my parents passed it down and never told me?? XD But then I learned that's just normal.... orz

Yeah, I'm sure I'm probably fine, but I just get that small little nagging worry when I've never had it checked or anything. o.<

I also tried to use a tampon for the first time ever a couple days ago. ._. I...... couldn't do it. OTZ It's just so scary, I feel like it's gonna hurt so bad when I try to stick it in. T_T;;; I'm so scared of gynecologist now. ;_; Though I guess it might be less sensitive there if I go when it's not period-time, I dunno. My body is not very.. welcoming to that sort of thing. T_T;;;;

I hate paper robes. ToT I've only done it once, for a physical where they just looked at my whole body. x_X Not for x-rays or anything. That was also the time when I thought girls were supposed to shave.. THERE, the same as shaving your legs, and I normally didn't because it didn't matter if nobody saw.. but since I was going to be seen by the doctor, I was ashamed to be a lazy non-shaver and shaved it all bare, thinking that was what you're always supposed to do. I later realized that actually probably made me look a lot more questionable OTZ

There was another time where they gave me one and left, and I wasn't sure what to do with it, so when they came back I was still clothed XD and then they were like "meh don't worry about it then" XDD

I've seen that chest thing on wiki before. I dunno if that's what I have or not ToT the example pic there is really scary, but that's labeled as a "severe case" so I dunno if a minor case would be like mine. Though it sounded like on wiki, that condition is where the sternum is sunken, where on mine it's like.. the sternum seems alright I think, but right below it, the left half of the ribcage dips in weird and pokes out a bit lower. So it's kind of a ~ shape instead of a normal convex shape like my right side. It's not hugely obvious but it's easy to see if I suck in my gut (and look like a starving child XD ). I also notice my skin there right under the breast, on the sunken rib part, always looks reddish and kinda strained with the blood vessels showing through or something like that. I doubt it's a problem but it looks kinda weird o_O like I'm an old lady or something. ;_;

Overall, I doubt it's any big problem since it hasn't caused me any pain or discomfort, recently at least. If that stuff in the past is related to it, it's a little troubling, but I guess now that I'm no longer in PE it doesn't matter XD and it's not such a huge deformity that it'd cause me psychological torment like that one paragraph on the wiki. ;-; but it is a little annoying, since it makes it easy to see my ribs if you look at my skin, and I always see people criticizing anyone whose ribs show and say it's disgusting and anorexic looking and etc. D: and I'm trying to someday work up the guts to go to a pool or beach again! I stopped going years ago because I got scared to be seen in public with a swimsuit. ^^; (not because of this at all, just because I was shy about people seeing my body in general) I think bikinis are cute but I've never had the guts to wear one and I wanna get over it! ;-; It's tough because it feels so naked and exposing but I guess it's just something you gotta jump in and get used to.

[keyk.livejournal.com]

I'm amazed you were able to in the first place! :O

Hahaha, I actually thought the same thing with the discharge. XD;;; I tend to think about rare toilet seat disease exchange stuff, too, unlikely as they are. ^^;

My cousins gave me a run-down on tampons (since I'm scared of them, too). If it hurts, you're putting it in wrong! XD They say to move it around until you find the place where it can go in without hurting? I dunno, never tried it myself, but my other female cousins say the same thing. I'm sure gynecologists are pretty understanding. I mean...I don't know of too many females who WOULDN'T feel nervous to go to a gyn, so...XD;; Don't feel to bad!

You shaved it?! I've never shaved before, so...XD; I hope you don't mind my finding that amusing! Oh, Jamuko.

As for your ribs...it seems like a minor deformity, but I don't think it'd hurt to ask? If it were me I would just go MEH IT'S MINOR ANYWAY and move on with life. 8DD;;;

With bikinis, I just feel uncomfortable because they often look loose to me? XD;;; I dunno. I just get worried for no reason, haha. I prefer one-pieces myself (and I'd need to get in better shape before I even try XDD). But there's nothing to be ashamed of! @o@ you can do it!

[jamuko.livejournal.com]

I'll try the tampon thing next time.. >o< maybe I can do it!

Shaving, er, yeah....... XD I never did before that but I dunno, I guess I was never told if you were supposed to do that or not, so I guess I assumed so since you shave other pubic hair like armpits and legs >.> but I was lazy! I didn't shave my legs either, I just hid them under pants. ^^; I'm trying to get in better habits about that though because I don't like feeling scared if anyone would see my legs somehow or something.

Anyway yeah.. feel free to be amused at that story XD; I'm amused at it myself. XD (poor, confused, naive Jamuko..) it's horrible since it probably made it look like I was sexually active to the doc, and he had to ask me twice to make sure I wasn't lying when I said I wasn't. ;___; I was like wtf, I just wanna play Pokemon ;_;

As for ribs.. yeah... MEH IT'S MINOR ANYWAY is basically what I've been doing all this time XD; I do that for pretty much everything so I'm starting to wonder if I might have overlooked something that might have actually mattered. XD I have a really "ah well, I'm sure it's fine~" mentality which has gotten me into some trouble at times ^^;

Bikinis.. l-loose? ;__; I never thought of that! I guess it'd be scary if you think a wave might knock it off or something XDD oh dear. I never heard of that happening before though, so maybe it's just a mental thing. For me, the biggest obstacle is just being seen so bare ._. even regular swimsuits have that problem for me though. I seriously don't think I've worn a single swimsuit ever since I hit puberty just because of that. ^^; I was actually terrified of being forced to when I was a camp counselor, but I managed to avoid it. ._.;

But, I was someone so shy of my body since then that I always hid it under clothing as much as possible, constantly wearing coats and baggy pants and stuff because I felt nice and hidden. ^-^; I finally got over that though, and don't feel so weird about anyone seeing me wearing more fitting clothing, but I still haven't quite passed the hurdles of wearing shorts, shirts that bare the shoulders or have a deeper cut neck, or swimsuits. I managed to wear skirts on occasion when I could also wear my cute tall socks!! *-* I love awesome socks, I dunno why. But, I only really feel comfortable wearing something like that when I'm around Alex, or at a place where people wear unusual clothing already like a convention.

.....I want a sukumizu ._.

[keyk.livejournal.com]

I have that "Eh, I'm sure it's fine" mentality, too! XD; I...really like guy's clothing still since it's so comfy (I tend to steal my brother's clothing orz). The reasons I don't want to wear clothing that's more showy is because I don't find them comfortable, and I don't look too good in them either, but, yeah, I'm not too comfortable showing my body too, haha. ;__; One day though!...But I really like retro clothing, which isn't showy at all. XD;;;; Time will tell!

My parents tell me not to shave 'cause it'll be a big pain later on, so I should just hide them all the time. ^^; If it makes you feel better, I thought you were supposed to shave there, too, but I didn't since I don't shave. I thought I was being really gross though. XD;; And what's wrong with awesome socks? Awesome socks are awesome! *__*

Yeah, I'm not comfortable in swimsuits either. ;__; I always need to wear shorts or a shirt or something else with the swimsuit for me to feel somewhat comfortable. I think you'd look cute in a sukumizu or a bikini though! D: Go, go!

[jamuko.livejournal.com]

Guys' clothing really is comfy. ;o; I just have a hard time finding some that isn't OMGHUEG on me.

W..wait.. shaving being a pain later on? ;___; That sounds scary, what goes wrong about it? I used to not do it even though my parents never told me anything like that, but it was just because I was lazy mostly. I already took too long in the shower. ^^; Then one time my mom forced me to wear shorts to school and I was too embarrassed to tell her that the reason I didn't want to was because I didn't shave, and then I was traumatized in school by being so ashamed with my unshaven legs showing right out there OTZ I'm really pale and my hair is kinda dark so it shows easily. ._.

I thought I was being really gross by not doing it too. XD I guess that's why I thought I better do it for the doc. orz Now, as far as I can tell, some people do it and some don't, and some just trim it, and it's just up to each person I guess o_O

I find that with shaving anything though, the more you do it, the less annoying it is. I had a hard time starting because it took a really long time and always irritated my pores, and they would get red and a lot of my hairs would get ingrown and it was all bad. >o< But now, when I shave pretty regularly, I guess my skin is getting accustomed to it, because it's a lot easier to do now than it was before and my skin doesn't seem to react so badly anymore. I think using moisturizing body wash helps too. It's still kinda hard to shave the whole armpit without cutting myself though x_x;

Awesome socks are indeed awesome!! *_* I went through a period of being extra obsessed with thigh-highs, knee-highs, and other tall socks, so I have a whole bunch of them XD I love them, but it's annoying in summer when it's hot and you need a pair of socks and all your clean ones are tall and hot! They also make me feel more comfortable to try wearing skirts though, since I feel more covered up even though I'm not really. (Well.. kinda XD )

I also have a bit of a panty obsession. ;___; It's kind of embarrassing, but I always want to go look at the cute panties they have at the store. XDD Stripes and cute designs and.. I dunno ;__; I don't like those weird lacy and er.. "slutty" looking ones though XD I also want to look at cute bras sometimes too. My best ones are actually from the kids' section, which is kind of.. questionable to be exploring around XD But they're cute and actually fit me tons better than any normal bras I've found >.< and some have a cute latch thing in front instead of the annoying one in back, so it's much easier to put on! I think it's intended so girls can learn how to wear them but I like them that way too. ;-;

...Am I weird? ;_; I just think they're cute, so I like these even though they go under my clothes where people can't see anyway. XD

Extra strange since I used to not care one bit about clothes of any kind. The hidden clothes-liker inside Jamuko, what? ;_;

[keyk.livejournal.com]

Haha, I take my brother's clothes from when he was younger, and those aren't huge on me! :DD Oh, no, it's not anything scary. ;__; It's just that you have to keep doing it over and over again since the hair just gets grosser the more you do it? XD;; I don't know how valid that story is, but my aunt and cousins have similar genes, and they shave, and that happened? XD;; I've...never heard anything about it's being LESS annoying though. Really? XDDD

I...REALLY like those uber preppy men's socks. T_T; I like golfer clothes, I DUNNO. I don't have any of my own, but they're SO COOL. I also like those cute patterned knee socks though mine are...falling apart, HAHA. And for the skirts, SAME HERE! I hate how socks aren't considered formal. ;_; I feel so bare wearing dresses.

You're not weird! I think that's really cute, actually! I liked my kids bras, but, uh, yeah, they were given away since my breasts don't fit in them anymore. Dang hormones. XDD;; They have a latch thing? *__* Do want. Lace is itchy and uncomfortable...and I don't get those transparent bras. @_@;

....Anime character designs probably got me more into clothing...actually. XD;;;;;;;;;;

[jamuko.livejournal.com]

Aww, that's cute! >w<

Hmm.. I have heard that some hair grows back thicker if you pluck it out, like eyebrow hair I think..? ?_? I dunno if that's just an urban legend or not though. XDD I never heard that with shaving legs. Mine have definitely gotten lighter and easier to work with after shaving them more often. ^^; The only problem is my sensitive pores, argh. I really want to figure out how to stop those for good.

Hehee! Golf clothes >X33 I do have a strange liking for things like argyle pattern. I found some argyle socks in the grocery store for $1 one time and bought them immediately. XDD I liked the colors on those too, black with red and gray and white I think :3

I also kind of have a liking of some gothic lolita fashion..... ;__; even though I normally hate super frilly stuff and things. I dunno! XD I think I'm just mesmerized by how poofy the skirts/dresses are. ;-; Makes me wanna wear one and floof it around. XD If it weren't for the fact that I'd have almost nowhere to wear it, I would have gotten one by now. ;-; I've seen some pretty cute stuff on ebay, but it's not exactly cheap.

Kids' bras.. strangely.. I never had when I was actually a kid. ;__; I'm so small, I actually didn't wear bras at all for a long time. ^^; Though I often wore undershirt tanktop type things instead, it was mostly just because I was embarrassed to not wear anything since I figured you were supposed to. I didn't really NEED it for any reason. ^^; I could still even get away without wearing bras (*cough*andstilldosometimeswhenI'mlazy*COUGH* ) because I don't actually need any support, but I wear them anyway because they er.. cover up and provide a smooth shape over the whole area ^-^;; (I also learned the hard way that some shirt materials are um.. painful on your.. SENSITIVE THINGS after a while if you're not wearing one ^^;; regular t-shirts are okay but yeah, the coverup thing. =x )

I sadly learned that I hate bras with wires in them :< since I by no means need any sort of wire support, it just ends up being uncomfortable with that thing pressed against me. I'm sad because I got some bras like that that I thought were really cute, too. ;-; It's a bit hard to find cute bras with no wire in them, but that's where the kids' section comes in handy. XDD (They're cheaper too! I think they were like 8 bucks each! )

...WHY AM I RAMBLING ABOUT BRAS XDD

Panties are really the cutest, but I dunno what more to say about them right now. XD Except that I hate being paranoid during that time of month because I don't want to stain any cute panties ;__; so I try to wear my crappiest ones during that time but then I'm embarrassed to have a set of unwanted panties just for that purpose. XD Maybe I should just find a bunch of good ones that are solid black for that time. I'd feel safer then.

Hahaha.... ditto on the anime character designs thing. XDD That's what did it for me too. I know I definitely got into the striped thigh highs and stuff because of that. ;-; And pleated skirts... and a track jacket... and hoodies-- no wait, I always loved hoodies regardless. XD And HAIRPINS! >w< So cute~

Basically anything cute and moe in anime pictures makes me end up wanting it for real. ;-; I think it's really cute when they wear a short skirt but it's with a big hoodie flopping over most of it. X3

[keyk.livejournal.com]

Wow, really? I almost always here about the shaving legs stuff. XD; And only occasionally for armpits and such.

Argyle? Argyle! So that's what it's called! Wow, that's pretty cheap for socks! D: But, yeah, I love those socks. ;__; I think they're adorable (everyone thinks I have an old man's taste when it comes to fashion, HAHA). I really love newspaper boy caps or whatever old man hats there are. Every time I see an old man it in, I think they're adorable. And their knitted vests! ;__; I...love old men's clothing, yeaaah.

Whoa, wow, yeah! I've actually wanted to wear goth loli clothes, too! Even...maid's clothing! XDD;; I have a friend who often designs and makes these things, and they look so cool! ;__; I wouldn't wear it out in the open, but I'd love to try it anyway!...and design them. XD They're so wonderfully tacky I just want to try it out sometime!

I'M JEALOUS. D8 I didn't like bras as a kid, and...I still don't. DDDDX I wish I could pass off without one (I think it's awesome you can, HAH!) since I've forgotten to wear them in the past. XD;;;;; I use cheap Asian rip-off bras, so I don't think I've used any with wire in them...have I? XD;; But then again, all my bras are old and, uh, too...small for me. XD; I should really get new ones! It's not like anything shows...usually, but it's hard to breathe! ^^;

I get paranoid about wearing new panties around that time, since I've, uh...dirtied them more often than once. >_>; I tend to...have a lot. I used to have a pair of black ones, but I dunno where those went. Lost in the laundry or something. Sad day.

Pleated skirts are so cute! ;_; (Why do I get the feeling I find fetishy clothing cute? HMMM.) Striped socks are so adorable! I don't often wear hoodies (I'm a big fan of buttons), but I think they look cool on other people! Yes! I love it when they have a short skirt and a big hoodie! So cute...but if I ever did that, I'd accomodate by wearing a long skirt and an even longer hoodie. HAHAHAHA.

[animetor-lily.livejournal.com]

I hate insomnia. Especially now. >.< and it's worse when you're sharing rooms so you can't get up, turn on the lights and do something productive rather than lie in your bed staring blankly at the ceiling. OTL

[keyk.livejournal.com]

Oh, no! *pat pat* T^T Yeah. It's hard to get up and do something productive since our parents get up randomly and scold us if we're not asleep yet. TDT Insomnia is sooo annoying. DDX I hope it'll go away soon for you. ;_;