Tch...

Aug. 10th, 2005 11:45 pm
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[personal profile] keyk
Vacation? Nope, not really. More crud that you probably don't care for.XP It's pretty lame so read at your own risk and ignore my bad grammar.

Almost everyone finds some part of me (if not all) annoying. I try my best to make them happier about me, but it just doesn't work. What triggered this journal? Some miniature arguement with my sister. My sister seemed pretty happy. I know she hates it when I bring up things from the past, but since she was happy, I thought she'd take it as the joke it was made to be.

Did she? Well, obviously not.
"I hate how Kay [aka me] always brings things up from the past! It pisses me off!"
She knows I don't like cuss words no matter how weak they are. I'm sure she emphasized that to make me feel bad and to show just how angry I make her.

She uses the computer a lot and I can't do as much because of that, true. But, I was telling the truth and I hoped it wouldn't make her angry. Her anger went slightly beyond my expectations...
I haven't been showing my angsty side lately since I'm almost sure it annoys people, but here I am.
The more these things happen, the more it hurts.

As for my brother, he's a pretty cheery guy. However, he does get mad at me at some points. Despite that fact, he always claims that he doesn't do so. Well, not in my book. Then he asks, "When?"
Does he expect me to tell what happened and what day it was? Specifically? Perhaps. I'm sorry, but my mind can't retain such things. I can, however, remember the way I felt. Describe? No. Rarely.

...I'm not going to bother writing about my parents. Sure, we're family and we love each other, but...
Ngeeuh! Just..so many things.

Well, sure I can get angry, but there are usually certain reasons for it. Usually, sadness and angst overpowers it. Am I strange? Of course. Am I someone to be cared for? Probably not so much as most. No one person on this earth truly understands me. Not even myself. Why must humans be so complex? Why must life be so painful? How can one take so much pride in himself despite all of the crimes he has committed? The story we humans must write is a long and strenuous journey. Some people become cowards and throw all of it away in seconds.

I'll try. I'll try my best to get through. For those of you who are reading, I thank you for caring. I wish you a good life. I hope I'll be able to oversome my small amount of pain and move on. Perhaps I'll be able to understand those who aren't understood. If only.

I'm sure you've had difficult times and days. We all wished they would go away. Even those who claim to like pain truly only want happiness. I should probably end this now.

Date: 2005-08-11 12:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pompi.livejournal.com
=_____=;

Me and my mouth. I knew from the silence you mad/angsting.
-___________________-;

*smacks self and her materialism*
Dude. Everyone has something annoying about them... And well, indeed that bringing up the past thing has been bothering me for years and somehow it ended up coming out like that. When I get annoyed, well, thing come out wrong. Seriously. If you read that journal entry long ago, then that proves my tendance to do that.

Intersting to wish them a good life. I wonder if you honestly wish me a good life too. *stomach churns from nervousness/sadness/worry/whatever it is* u_u;

Dude, sometimes... you think really deep things.
I say, let it out. It made me somewhat of a better person. At least I don't start yelling about every little thing anymore... or do I? and none of you tell me. U_U

Date: 2005-08-12 12:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jamuko.livejournal.com
I hope I'm not intruding... ._.; Just tell me if you'd rather I stay out of personal things like this...

You probably know, but I don't find any part of you annoying. ;_; It might be worthless to say that, since I hope there isn't reason to think I do, but... ^^; I thought I'd say it anyway. I think it happens to everyone... getting into fights with people you live with. Even the least annoying person in the world can become an irritation to someone when they are around constantly.

And onaofanjefobhgw! What do you mean you are not someone to be cared for as much as most? ;_; Don't let yourself believe that. There is no one that should be cared for any less, especially someone like you with such pure and kind intentions. ;_; I know what it's like to feel inferior, or worthless, but don't let yourself believe it, okay? ;_; I promise you things will get better, and there is nothing wrong with you.

I know I can't understand completely, and there are lots of things that happen that I would not know about, but... even though there are differences, many fundamental values are the same. I have been through many things, some of which are probably pretty similar to what you are going through now. I suppose it's all just a part of growing up... and I know it's hard, and it stinks, but know that you're not alone, okay? ^^ If you ever feel like you want to talk, or rant, or anything at all, I'm always willing to listen. ^_^

*hug*

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